Watching these tiny little birds on our porch, I wondered what it must be like for them when they take their first flight.
I’m not sure why, but these last few days I have doubted my abilities in just about every area of my life. I have honestly felt like there is someone shouting in my mind, “Who do you think you are? You certainly aren’t a writer, why would anyone want to read what you have to say?… Start running again? ha, ha. You couldn’t do that. You’ve let too much time go by, besides that, your too old!… There is absolutely no way you are going to find time to home school this year. You simply have too many kettles in the fire!… Give up! Give up! Give up!”
Even though I know better than to listen to these self destructive thoughts, I admit they got my attention. I was listening to them and even beginning to believe them. In fact I was tempted to change my course in a few areas.
Not being the first time this has happened to me, I knew the first step I needed was to seek God and listen to Him for clarity in my mind. As the condemning comments continued, I chose to read and reread the scripture verses I have been focusing on. ( For more on learning to listen to God, click here.)
“Therefore, do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need for endurance, so that when you have done the will of God, you may receive what was promised.” Hebrews 10:35-36 (NASB)
“But my righteous one shall live by faith; and if he shrinks back, My soul takes no delight in him.” Hebrews 10:38 (NASB)
Yesterday I came across an article that my good friend, Shara, wrote called, Marathon Training and Homeschooling. No, I’m not interested in marathon training, but the principles were exactly what I needed to hear!
“Whenever it comes up that I’ve run 2 half-marathons (not that this comes up much…HA!), the response I get from people who don’t run is, “I could never do that!!
I am here to tell you…you can!! Unless there is some REAL medical condition keeping people from running, a vast majority of the people who tell me they “never could”, in fact, very much could. They maybe couldn’t today, I couldn’t today:). But they could in 6 months (and usually much sooner). You start one step at a time and train. I started with a novice schedule. It assumed I could run 2 miles. If you can’t yet run 2 miles start with running one block. Then 2 tomorrow. You can, it just takes persistence and time.”
Shara’s, article isn’t just about running or homeschooling, it is about life! It reminded me that I need to trust God and act on what I know to be true.
Another woman I know has a blog she has kept up for many years called i am baker. Last night as I looked over some of her posts, I noticed how she declared who she was in her titles: i am baker, i am mommy, i am author, i am servant.
This morning, as I woke to the same lousy voice in my head, I remembered the declarations of i am baker. I chose to declare who I am, not who I’m not.
So, those are all good points, but it wasn’t until I physically acted on my beliefs, that I started to regain my confidence.
“For by Thee I can run upon a troop; and by my God I can leap over a wall.” (Psalm 18:29)
FYI: I conquered 2 miles early this morning! :)
Special thanks to my dear husband that always, always, always supports and loves me!